Have you Ever…

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I was nine years old, on my way to Brownies (the group you attend before you can become a Girl Guide), proudly wearing my little brown dress with the white-and-orange scarf and the jaunty little brown beret. I dearly loved that uniform. And I loved being part of something: this was the first official ‘club’ that I had ever joined and I could not have been more delighted.

The group met once a week in the basement of a local church no more than a kilometer away. Back in those days, it was unheard of for parents to drive their children such a short distance, and it would certainly not have occurred to me to ask. And so, I was walking, likely deep in a daydream, and probably singing a song under my breath, as usual paying very little attention to the world past the tips of my fingers.

That changed when two teenaged boys suddenly stepped out on the sidewalk in front of me. I know now that they could not have been much more than 13 or 14 but at the time, they looked like adults to me. “Have you ever been fu _ _ed?” demanded one of the boys.

“What’s that mean?” I quavered.

“This,” he stated triumphantly, as he punched me – hard – in the stomach. I have no recollection of what happened after that: my next memory is of being home, crying in my father’s arms.

Years later, I saw the boy who hit me, working at a local movie theatre. He did not appear to recognise me and I was in no hurry to remind him. By that time, I understood the word he had used and I knew that I had gotten off very easy.

My sister called me a few years ago to tell me that he had passed away. I did try to summon up a charitable thought, but found instead that I could feel absolutely nothing at all…

Patti Moore Wilson © wednesdayschildca.wordpress.com

* Source of photo

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Author: Patti Moore Wilson, wednesdayschild2

I write what I feel. And I rarely know exactly what I feel until I write. I have lived long enough to have known many joys and many sorrows. I have made many mistakes; I have forgiven myself for a few… I have learned that there are lessons in every step of this journey, if we only take the time to pay attention… I hope you will feel free to pick and choose the stories that resonate for you…

15 thoughts on “Have you Ever…”

    1. A few people I have known and loved deeply have confessed to me – many years after the fact – that they bullied or were unkind to someone when they were children. One friend in particular, carries a burden of shame that she tells me gets heavier every year. I have often wondered whether this kid grew up to regret his actions, or if he simply moved on to find more targets as an adult. I really do hope for the former…🙁

      Liked by 2 people

  1. That is so sad, there are a lot of meanies out there and kids have to be protected all the time from them, how scary for you to have such a horrible memory. There is no excuse for behaviors like that but there are reasons. Maybe that monster of a kid had a monster in their life that mentored them. Monsters sometimes create monsters, but then there are those lucky few that get away and never repeat those patterns.

    Liked by 1 person

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