How Are You (Reposted)

Charlie Brown

I do apologise. I have not posted in quite awhile. My health is never great at this time of the year and my energy levels always attest to that.

This was my very first post, almost a year ago now. It didn’t get much attention – it’s a bad attempt at poetry, which is not my forte. But the feelings were real. And the words suit this time of year, when it appears that everyone is scurrying around preparing The. Best. Christmas. Ever. Music is sweet and nostalgic; folks are preparing to go home for the holidays; family members are surreptitiously wrapping presents; cookies are being baked and plans being made.

But this is a hard, lonely time of the year for so many: this is the time of year when losses are felt most deeply; the time of the year when being alone feels lonelier than at any other time of the year; the time of year when we try too hard; eat too much; drink too much; spend too much; do too much. This is the time of year when weak marriages tend to end; when families tend to fight or to shatter. Or just not come home at all.

When you are out and about, I urge you to take the time to listen to people’s responses after you have asked them how they are. I mean, really, really listen…

This is such an easy time of the year to slip, unnoticed, through the cracks…


How Are You?

You ask me how I am
And then glance past my shoulder
Already anxious
To continue your errands
"Fine." I reply
"Great, great," you answer
Already dancing on your toes
Poised to be on your way
I wonder,
As I often do
What you would say
If I told you the truth
"I feel terrible; hopeless
Nothing holds any meaning
I spend huge chunks of my day
Wishing I were dead."
"Great, great,"
You would likely reply with disinterest,
So ingrained is your anticipation
Of a polite, meaningless answer
I watch you scurry away
And I wonder
How you could have missed
The black cloud hanging over my head

Source of photo

Patti Moore Wilson ©


Author: Patti Moore Wilson, wednesdayschild2

I write what I feel. And I rarely know exactly what I feel until I write. I have lived long enough to have known many joys and many sorrows. I have made many mistakes; I have forgiven myself for a few… I have learned that there are lessons in every step of this journey, if we only take the time to pay attention… I hope you will feel free to pick and choose the stories that resonate for you…

18 thoughts on “How Are You (Reposted)”

  1. You make such a good point here. I think there’s also a responsibility for us to be genuine in our response to “how are you?” which can be difficult for many. We don’t have to tell people exactly what’s going on with us if we don’t want to, but it’s OK to respond authentically. It’s a beautiful poem, Patti. I’m sorry to hear your health hasn’t been good lately, but I hope you have a wonderful Christmas.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks so much, Julie… I never ask the question anymore without waiting for the real answer. And of course, I don’t push if they are not prepared to share. Thanks for asking about my health: I suffered an adrenal exhaustion several years ago and now it never takes much to knock me down. I just have to make sure I get lots of down time (a bit hard to find at this time of year). Thanks so much for stopping by…💕

      Liked by 1 person

  2. A lovely poem, especially so as it is your thoughts… thank you for sharing… hope there are no dark clouds in your world and you and your family have a wonderful holiday filled with love and happiness…. 🙂

    “When a friend is in trouble, don’t annoy the friend by asking if there is anything you can do. Think up something appropriate and do it.”

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks SO much Larry… I do find this time of year a bit difficult (blasted expectations), but thankfully, the cloud hasn’t been around for quite awhile. When I notice it hanging over another’s head, I have found the best gift is simply to stop and listen. And oh, what a great quote (as always)…

      Liked by 1 person

  3. This time of year is difficult. I find that I can cope fine with the Cold, but its the really short days and when we have a few gloomy days back to back, I feel like I need to sunshine. The Stresses of Christmas don’t help. I love Christmas once it’s here but the run-up isn’t great. Anxiety and depression are not a great mix. I thought your poem was excellent, putting into words so succinctly what it can be like.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Yes:I can totally relate to this!

    With chronic illness I find it’s easier to just lie…
    ( Sense most people asking me don’t actually want the truth, in any case.)

    Hope you have a good 2019!

    (Expect you got my New Year’s Eve e-mail?)

    Best wishes from Ken

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much Ken! And I am so very sorry for taking so long to reply. I have been struggling with extremely low energy levels since my adrenal exhaustion a few years ago and the last three months or so have not been productive ones. I seem to have lost your e-mail. Could I trouble you to resend it? Sincerest thanks in advance…


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